Can leaders succeed but fail where it really counts?
Mr. Ross Raines, is a coach and President of Teir1, is a successful business leader who has my highest respect. The following is a note he sent me. With his permission I am sharing it with you in case you know someone who needs to succeed where it really counts.
Bill is a talented and very successful entrepreneur. As his company has grown, so has his ability to provide the things he wanted for his family. The financial security he’s been working toward is within sight, but now he is questioning everything he has worked so hard for. He is losing his family! His wife has filed for divorce and his children are angry and confused, often siding with their mother. Bill wonders how it all got to this.
You may know a Bill, but certainly don’t plan to follow his example. It’s really hard to maintain a healthy balance between family and business! How do we avoid following Bill and still be successful in business?
Think Right – Act Right!
No matter how effective you may be as a business leader, you are replaceable at work. Not so at home! You are the only spouse and father or mother in your family. At work we strive to lead through others by delegating appropriate responsibilities to team members with the right skills, aptitudes and strengths, but at home key leadership responsibilities cannot be delegated. Your role at home is God-given – not to be delegated or taken lightly.
So right thinking forms the basis for right actions.
At work we are constantly called on to make tough decisions and prioritize our time and resources. Good things must often yield to more important things. It makes sense that we need to be as intentional about leading the family as we are about leading the business. It is all stewardship. Let me highlight just a couple of key thoughts.
Models can help us succeed
Many people have never seen healthy priorities modeled, nor had a support system to encourage them. Not having good models to learn from can leave us doing unhealthy things we had modeled for us early in life – to the detriment of our family, both now and in future generations. Have you found others to model for you how to successfully lead a healthy family, build an excellent business and have a great impact in the process? In business or home Good models and coaches are worth searching for.
Like healthy businesses, healthy family life doesn’t just happen. Here are a few starter ideas:
- Plan a family calendar together; set dates for family together times and let everyone participate in deciding how those times will be spent; put the dates into you business calendar and be careful not to let other things preempt your family times.
- Take a walk with your spouse after dinner and ask about his or her day. Walking makes the talking easier and you’ll both get some stress-reducing exercise. Your kids will benefit too from your healthier marriage and reduced stress level!
- If you haven’t had a date with your spouse for a while, plan one soon, not just on a special occasion. How about a date with your daughter or son doing their favourite thing, just the two of you? Take the opportunity to tell your “date” what you like most about them — and leave the needed improvements for another time.
- Practice leaving work at work. On the drive home listen to music or something that will help you be fully present for the family when you walk in the door. Turn off the Blackberry until you’re back at work. It may be hard for a while, but the dividends will be worth it!